NISCHITAARTHA:
Nischitaartha/Engagement will take place in girl’s house.Groom’s mother will bless the girl with Arishina Kumkuma,Fruits,Flowers,Artifacts,Cosmetics,Bangles,Jewellery,Saree and an engagement ring.The bride’s parents also bless the groom and give him a ring, a watch and other gifts.Traditionally bride and groom are not supposed to see/touch each other before wedding.Hence elders perform this custom of wearing rings.After this Lagna Patrika [i.e. Marriage card] would be wri tten and read by the Purohits that day.Lagna Patrikas would contain the information about the marriage date,time i.e muhurtam and the venue details.Its a formal announcement for the relatives and friends that both of them are engaged!
PRE WEDDING RITUALS:
In Karnataka, the pre wedding rituals commence with Naandi custom. It is performed by both the bride and the groom in their houses. It is done to ensure the marriage takes place uninterruptedly.Just before the groom leaves for the bride's village, all the items for marriage are placed in front of Lord Ganesha to seek his blessings. This is called Deva Karya ceremony. After this, both the bride and the groom are applied turmeric paste.
WEDDING RITUALS:
On the wedding day the first ritual is Mantap puja, according to which the mantap and the hall where the wedding is to be conducted are purified. After this the bride's father worships the groom by washing his feet. This is known as Varapuja. This is followed by bride's entry to the mantap. Here, they exchange garlands on the chant of holy mantras. Next is the Dhare custom, wherein the bride's parents give away her daughter to the groom, by placing a coconut and betel over their hands and pouring holy water. Then the groom ties mangalsutra around bride's neck. After this, Saptapadi ceremony is held and the couple takes seven rounds around the sacred fire.
DEVARA SAMARAADHANE AND NAANDI CEREMONY:
The first function prior to madhwa marriage is the Devara Samaradhane, which means offering prayers to “Family Deity”. Prayers are offered to pithrus to invoke their blessings by the parents of bride and bride groom, this is called Naandi.
Naandi is small ceremony which quick offs the marriage function which is usually done 10 days before the wedding day.Its believed that once Naandi is done then any birth or death happens in the family they will not postpone the wedding. The function takes place in groom’s and bride’s home separately at a particular time of that particular day.It starts with Prarthane[Prayer] and GanaHoma [ Homa performed to please Lord Ganesha].In Indian system usually all the auspicious functions begin with praying Lord Ganesha and wedding is not an exception. According to Vedas, when a person is married, he would be entering in to Gruhastaashrama [which is one of the 4 ashramas : Brahmacharya ashram, Grihasthaashram, Vanaprasthaashram and Sannyasaashram].In our tradition the groom would sit on mom’s lap and father would cut little hair from his head.Cutting hair/Tonsuring is the outward symbol of beginning a new life.So customs prepare him to enter in to the new stage of life ( i.e from Brahmacharyaashram to Grihasthaashram). Then groom would sit in front of the Tulasi Katte and women would pour holy water on him [Kalasha Snanam] and bless him.
The bridegroom is considered as God and he is honoured and worshipped by the father of the bride.He will be given gifts from the brides side will be given gifts from the brides side.
KASHI YATRA:
The next is Kaashi Yatre tradition.
Kashi Yatra is a unique custom performed where the groom is dressed in the traditional katche Panche. He will wear slippers, umbrella,2 big rings[ which is made up of rice flour] to the ear and hold walking stick in the hand.This is a very interesting part of the wedding where the groom embarks on a mock pilgrimage to renounce the world .
It is an interesting ritual, wherein the groom pretends of leaving for Kashi as he is devoid of a suitable bride. He will pretend that he will go to Kaashi and spend the rest of his life there. He stops when his maternal uncle shows him the bride he has chosen for him. As he steps out of the kalyana mantapa the bride’s father & groom’s uncle pleads to stop him and will persuades him to stay back by marrying his daughter.The groom makes many objections but finally accepts and returns to the mantapa to get married!
Kashi Yatra is symbolic.It gives the option to groom to leave the worldly treasures and lead the life of an ascetic or get married and become a householder.
The wedding day begins with Mangala Vadyam.
Parents and relatives from bride will welcome the groom and his relatives to the wedding hall.The bride’s parents and other members from her family wash the feet of the groom, his parents and welcome them.One more thing is groom’s sister has to hold a Kalasha ( small pot filled with holy water,Bettle Leaves & Flowers) and a Mirror (kannadi in kannada) and rice.She has to accompany the groom till the bride comes to Mantapa.
DRESS CODE FOR BRIDE AND GROOM:
The groom wears a silk ‘dhoti’ (a waist to ankle length silk fabric with borders) and an ‘angavastram’ (shalya) across his shoulders.He will also wear a Peta( popularly known as Mysore Peta) and will hold a stick in the hand. Bride wears a White silk sari and a uttareeya ( saree folded and tied across her shoulder).She would tie a long hair as Bun(KONDE OR GANTU IN KANNADA) OR Decorate with flowers which is known as Moggina Jede.
Bride has to keep koumari Kumkuma on her forehead.
Basinga is tied on the forehead of both bride and groom by the elders which is considered as auspicious.
The wedding ceremony- divided into following segments:
VARAMAALA :
The bride is escorted to the mantapa by her Maternal Uncle.A curtain is put between them.Its called as "Antarapata".Then at auspicious muhurtam both of them will put Jeerige -Bella on each other's head & exchange the garlands.
KANYADAANA:
The complexity of an Indian Hindu marriage is owing to the fact that there are many rituals performed according to Vedic practices and hymns. Kanyadaana is also such a ritual, which apart from being vital to the ceremony, tugs at the emotional cord of the bride's parents. This is the moment when their beloved daughter finally belongs to her husband. Kanyadaana is performed on the main day function of the wedding.
It is performed by the Father of the bride, where in he entrusts his daughter to the groom. In the absence of the father, Kanyadaana is performed by an elderly relative or member of the family. As per the practice, the father of the bride places the right hand of the bride over the right hand of the groom .Sri Lakshmi Narayana idol is kept along with a coconut on top of the bride & groom's palm.Then the father of the bride pours out a libation of sacred water symbolizing the giving away of the daughter to the bride groom.As a condition for offering his daughter for marriage, the father of the bride requests a promise from the groom for assisting the bride in realizing the three ends : Dharma, Artha, and Kama. The groom makes the promise by repeating three times that he will not fail the bride in realizing Dharma, Artha and Kama. After this, the priest recites Vedic hymns.
This way the father gives her daughter as a gift to the groom. As per tradition, groom is considered a form of Lord Vishnu. Thus, presenting him gifts is deemed as the greatest honour for the parents of the bride. As a result, they offer their daughter to the groom, who is their most cherished gift. As a symbol of acceptance, the groom touches the right shoulder of the bride, promising to take care of her and holding her responsibility.
MAANGALYA DHAARANE:
Amidst chanting of vedic hymns, the groom ties the knot to bride.
In Hindu weddings, one of the most sacred customs is of tying mangalsutra. It is basically a black and gold beaded necklace with a gold or diamond pendant. Mangalsutra carries immense importance in Hindu weddings as well as in the lives of Hindu married women. A mangalsutra is tied around the neck of the bride by the groom during the wedding rituals. It is a symbol of marriage.
The word mangalsutra can be deciphered as 'sacred thread or cord'; as 'mangal' means auspicious and 'sutra' means thread or cord. Though in appearance it looks like a jewellery item, it is definitely much more than that. The concept is thought to have originated in South India, where it is known as thali or thaali or maangalya. It is a yellow thread painted with turmeric paste and is tied around the bride's neck with three knots. It has a great importance in Indian tradition.Its believed that Godess Shri Mahalakshmi resides in the Thali and protects the marriage from any evil.
Three Knots used for tying thali symbolize three different aspects of a married woman-
1.The first knot represents her obedience to the husband.
2.The second to parents.
3.The third represents her respect for God.
However, the shape and size of mangalsutra varies from state to state and region to region. In north India, it is a necklace with black and gold beads with either a gold or diamond pendant. In the west, it consists of two gold rounds with black beads. Moreover, they are available in all sizes from short to long. Considering the importance of mangalsutra, it is worn as a symbol of marital dignity and chastity. It is a promise from a husband to his wife that they will always stay together. It depicts the union of the husband and the wife and protects them from evil. Whatever might be the meaning, mangalsutra occupies a significant position in Hindu marriages and rituals. Not to forget, women have become quite flexible nowadays, in relation with the custom of wearing mangalsutra. With fast paced development, mangalsutra has also become a fashion statement. Women now go for exclusive designs and are ready to experiment.
Apart from the mangalsutra, the Toe rings, the Kumkum, bangles and nose ring are also offered to the bride. All these ceremonies are performed in front of Homa Kunda.Agnideva the fire God, is evoked to witness the proceedings.The priest lights a sacred fire in the presence of the bride and groom.
PAANI GRAHANAM:
After Mangalya Dhaaranam, the groom lowers his right palm and encloses it over the right hand of the bride. He covers all the five fingers of the right hand of the bride with his right palm through this act of paani grahanam.He prays for long life, progeny, prosperity and harmony with the bride during their married life.
LAAJA HOMA :
It is an important part of the wedding. The bride’s brother gives his sister puffed rice.The groom guides the bride’s hands and the puffed rice is consigned to the sacred fire.This signifies the bridegroom asking the bride to merge completely with her new family.
SAPTHAPADI:
This is the ritual where the couple walk around the sacred fire. The groom walks with the bride to the right side of the sacred fire while holding his wife’s right hand. He stops, bends down and holds the right toe of his wife with his right hand and helps her take seven steps around the fire. At the beginning of each step, he recites a Vedic mantra. The se seven vows are known as Sapthapadi, which are performed along with Mangalavadhya & walking with holding the brides hand, which revolves around the sacred fire. Any marriage is incomplete without these vows and is deemed complete once they are conducted. On the day of the wedding the bride and the groom sit under the Mantapa or the scared canopy for this ritual. The bride is seated towards left of the groom before the pheras, while towards the right after they are complete.
Seven handfuls of rice and coins are placed in the northern periphery of the ‘Mantapa’. As the groom leads the bride to each pile, she places her right toe on it, while he says :
1. ‘With this first step be the giver of food’.
Groom: You will offer me food and be helpful in every way. I will cherish you and provide welfare and happiness for you and our children.
Bride:
I am responsible for the home and all household responsibilities.
2. ‘With this second step be the source of strength’.
Groom:
Together we will protect our house and children.
Bride: I will be by your side as your courage and strength. I will rejoice in your happiness. In return, you will love me solely.
3. ‘With this third step be my prosperity’.
Groom:
May we grow wealthy and prosperous and strive for the education of our children. May our children live long.
Bride: I will love you solely for the rest of my life, as you are my husband. Every other man in my life will be secondary. I vow to remain chaste.
4. ‘With this fourth step be my source of happiness.
Groom:
You have brought sacredness into my life, and have completed me. May we be blessed with noble and obedient children.
Bride: I will shower you with joy, from head to toe. I will strive to please you in every way I can.
5. ‘With this fifth step be the mother of our children’.
Groom:
You are my best friend, and staunchest well-wisher. You have come into my life, enriching it. God bless you.
Bride: I promise to love and cherish you for as long as I live. Your happiness is my happiness, and your sorrow is my sorrow. I will trust and honor you, and will strive to fulfill all your wishes.
6. ‘With this sixth step be my companion in all seasons’.
Groom:
May you be filled with joy and peace.
Bride: I will always be by your side.
7. ‘With this seventh step be my friend forever’ .
Groom:
We are now husband and wife, and are one. You are mine and I am yours for eternity.
Bride:
As God is witness, I am now your wife. We will love, honor and cherish each other forever.
So the bride and groom take seven steps together, symbolizing the beginning of their journey through life as partners.
SIGHTING OF ARUNDHATI AND DHRUVA NAKSHATRA:
Once the Sapthapadi is completed, the groom gently places the bride’s foot on a grinding stone near the fire and slips silver rings on her toes. The couple is then shown the Dhruva Nakshatra or Pole Star a symbol of permanence and also the ‘Arundhati Nakshatra, a symbol of purity and virtue.
Later a Traditional Meal is served on banana leaves.Its called as "BHOOMA".They put five Banana Leaves together & make the Newly Wed Couple to eat together.The place will be decorated with Colourful Rangoli,Silver Deepada Kambhas & Candles will be lit. Five types of sweets.Special arrangements are made to seat the groom’s family.
GRUHAPRAVESHAM:
Gruhapravesham is the official ceremony where bride enters her marital home.The groom’s mother and sister receive the bridal couple at the doorstep.Groom’s sisters will block them in the door and ask them to sing songs,play some games.Groom has to bribe them then only they will allow the couple to enter.A measuring jar (Seru) filled with raw rice & Jaggery is kept on the threshold of the main door and the bride is asked to kick it slowly with her right foot and then enter with the husband.She is now officially the daughter-in-law. Women will perform a ‘Aarti’ for the couple.
After all the rituals are over there will be Reception in the evening.It is just a formal function to introduce the new couple to family, friends and relatives.A wedding feast will be served.Now a days people also arrange orchestra or some musical programs to entertain the guests.
The Reception party concludes the wedding, which is organized in a banquet hall by the groom's family. The main aim of this party is introduction of the bride, enjoyment, and relishing mouth watering delicacies.
POST WEDDING RITUALS:
After the wedding, when the bride comes to her marital home, she is given a warm welcome by her in-laws. A vessel filled with rice & Jaggery is kept at the entrance of the house and she is asked to knock it inside the house, with her right foot. After this, the bride enters the house and this is called Griha Pravesh. After this is the name change ceremony, in which the groom decides a name for his wife. He then inscribes it with a ring on a plate, containing rice. On the second day after marriage, the bride's parents visit the newly wed couple. They then take the couple to their home along with themselves. The couple stays there for some days after which the groom's family goes to the bride's house to take them back. Lunch is hosted by the groom’s parents on the next day of wedding,which is also called as Beegara Outhana. On that morning Satyanarayana Pooja will be performed in the groom’s house.Bridal couple start their new life by performing the auspicious pooja.
Fifth day of the wedding again a wedding feast will be served in both the houses (family) as they do chapparada pooje.
THINGS THAT ARE TO BE GIVEN TO GROOM FROM GIRL'S SIDE:
FOR ENGAGEMENT:
1.Gold Finger Ring,Pant,Shirt OR a Kurta Pyjama.
2.Design Cobra as mark of respect.
3.Dry fruits.
4.Sweets.
5.Artifacts.
6.Perfume,Toileteries etc.
AT WEDDING:
VARA POOJA:
MEERA BHAKTA
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